Oh, who am I kidding? I get invited to go boldly (translation: blindly) into new experiences all the time.
In fact, that's what I'm known for...getting myself into adventures about which I have no clue. Which is another way of spelling T.R.O.U.B.L.E.
In, yet one more Lucille-Ball-meets-Rachel-Ray moment, I agreed to pay a game of F.E.V.E.R. (we know it as H.O.R.S.E.) with one returning Fever player and two basketball players trying out for the WNBA Indiana Fever team.
I am only 5 feet 3 inches tall...
I decided to bring some help; some really tall help.
My thought process was to bring great athletes with me. This would give me a chance to, for once in my life, win at an athletic event.
The problem being that I don't know any athletes, professional or otherwise.
Bring in teammates who could pretend they know how to play basketball. At least for a few minutes until we get whipped by the powerful Fever women.
I made a call.
Patricia Rettig, media and public relations director of Beef and Boards, 9301 N. Michigan Road, Indianapolis, hooked me up with some bodyguards, er, um, I mean teammates.
Enter Stage Left:
Eddie Curry, casting director of Beef and Boards, and an actor, Jeff Stockberger, assistant director of Beef and Boards, and also an actor, and Elizabeth J. Musgrave, writer of the finer things in life...non-athletic.
Okay, actors, acting like they can play basketball, and a writer (me) writing about the event afterward (now) against three really tall, physically fit athletes.
Did I mention I am vertically and athletically challenged?
Enter Stage Right:
Three women, professional athletes, looking fierce. Allie Quigley, Christina Wirth and Shay Murphy. Although all three tried out for the team, Murphy is the athlete who made the team, proving to be an asset early on.
Now, I am not going to say the athletes were scared of us or anything, but I am sure they were worried. You believe that, right?
Well, I bowed out first, then Jeff Stockberger, and, well, you get the idea...it wasn't pretty. Curry lasted the longest with the pros. The winners were gracious and didn't laugh at us. Not too much, anyway.
Bottom Line: I do not feel bad that I was barely beaten by the WNBA Fever team. Not one bit...oh, okay, humiliated was more like it. However, considering they are playing Game 3 of the series in New York tonight, losing to that particular group of athletes makes us members of that large club: teams taken down by The Fever.
Not a bad distinction.
Elizabeth J. Musgrave is a syndicated columnist, travel writer and theater critic. Catch her as Indy’s Arts & Entertainment Adviser on 93.1 WIBC and follow her on Facebook, Twitter and at gottago.us. Comments can be sent to firstname.lastname@example.org.
Photo Credits: PLR
Links: feverbasketball.com, beefandboards.com
Gotta Go is published in the following newspapers: South Sider Voice, Indiana Weekender, West Side Community News, New Palestine Reporter, West Indianapolis Community News, Pendleton Times Reporter and Fortville-McCordsville Reporter.